From The Vault #3: Numa Numa Love Story

There was this birthday party at a cheesy pizza-esque restaurant for a guy who looked like Gary Brolsma. He had a huge crush on me and thought we were going out, but I didn’t like him at all. His family and friends were surrounding me at the party; they were so happy to meet me, but I really wanted to leave.

He went into another room for a while and I was forced to painfully talk to his friends, and then, next thing I knew, he was stone cold dead and no one knew why. I was kind of guiltlessly glad that he died, and part of me wanted to dissect him to find out why.